underemployment and boredom impressed since Rucksackklau my time as a volunteer in Weltwärts AIDER. I had and have in the office just to do nothing. Everyday life would look like this: I come to the office at 8:30 am and as long as I my private affairs (e-mail, football results, etc.) have relatively good mood. If I have done this, however, my mood curve drops off rapidly until the lunch break. I'm usually quite annoyed to have lunch and then go home to me during a nap in my hammock a bit to respond from. Back in the office I go by the morning procedure a second time and wait about 4 clock anxiously for the evening ceremony. That this situation is a not particularly satisfying, can think of any. So I'm in the recently fallen deeper and deeper into a hole. I could rouse myself less and less motivation to do something and my curve went into negative territory. The stolen backpack further magnified, of course.
I know myself that I am personally responsible for the success or failure of my year at AIDER. The initial misconception that anyone here is waiting with prepared tasks for me, I have long been identified as such and I am aware that welwärts not guaranteed a great year to be. But I found it very recently been very hard for me to bring me out of my lethargy and to look for a job. The preparation for the seminar preached "proactive" is, you find yourself in a situation like me right now, really a heavy task.
Last Monday, so the situation reached its peak-or nadir. One of the problems at work or a dispute with our landlord came. We now have a 2-page catalog of rules and if we do not observe this thrown out. But for that we are personally responsible, because we behave partially incorrect. So I ran at 10 clock in the office to the gym and gave up my aggression. Afternoon in the office in search of a job for next year, all my prejudices that I have in the have developed recently against AIDER confirmed, so I got really mad. Manuel tried to appease me, but helped at first. He told me something of potato dumplings and fat eyes. I was a potato dumpling that lies at the bottom of the pot and does not come up. To improve my situation, I would have a fat eye that floats on top of the soup, be. Funny story I thought, but somehow true. I am really fallen into a deep hole and must try now to get there somehow turn out.
I went home and thought. I really had to change something because it could not go on.
The next day I went with some motivation fueled the office. I made a to-do list and doing a lot of things, though largely private, which I had pushed in recent days and weeks ahead of me. I also tried to create me a plan for the first quarter of 2010. I spoke with an employee, Alejandro, who has a new project, dedicated to the production of natural latex, launched. I can, he said, from January to work at it, go with him into the forest and drive Comunidades. This all sounds quite interesting and my motivation slowly began to get back into positive ranges. Evening, but then a setback. I was with a colleague, my Planning and deny they said that they would prefer it if I would participate in one project, Sustainable Forest Management in three (new) Comunidades. I wondered why she had not told me sooner. For weeks, I vegetate in front of me in the office, has not organize a task for me, and now I take the helm, myself, and then someone comes in and tells me he is thinking for me otherwise. Again, I was annoyed by AIDER. Fortunately I had arranged for the evening a Skype date with Merle. It is weltwärts in Ecuador and it was lovely once again to speak to over 4 months with her and our experiences exchange.
is now already the last day before the Christmas holidays. I talked yesterday with my boss, Pio, and he told me that I can decide for myself, in which employees of the two projects I want to. This took me back a step to the fore. I'm going with a decision to come back from vacation, then from January to a hopefully more interesting and more fulfilling work have. But I also know that my happiness is mine. I have to run after the people, for the last few months have shown that this is not different from AIDER is around. I hope that I, for from the potato dumpling Fat eye, would that I can break out of my hole and my unmotivated nature to my Weltwärts year, to make it a success.
But now I will for a few days not only think about the work. Soon it is common here in the office Christmas meal followed by exchanging gifts. In the collective drinking beer but I will not be there, because I've unfortunately caught an ear infection. I will not complain, because the only thing that can help me at the moment is positive in looking to the future. And this looks rosy for the next two weeks. It goes by bus to Tarapoto. Thereafter Moyobamba to Chachapoyas to the ruins of Kuelap and the Catarata Gocta, the third highest waterfall on earth, and back to Moyobamba to communicate with other volunteers to celebrate including my roommates from Pucallpa and Betty from Villa Rica, Christmas. Then we go to Mancora, the busiest resort of Peru to celebrate New Year with the T-shirt and at 30 degrees at sea. If I'm lucky, my boss gives us until 10.01. free. In this case, I would still go to Quito to attend Merle.
This is probably my last entry in 2010 will be. I have had great experiences so far in Peru, have much see and learn and was allowed, thanks AIDER introduced to new cultures. There were setbacks, the stolen backpack, and the last time was described, not always easy. But I prefer quite a positive awareness of the first third of my Weltwärts year. Bad experiences are easy to do and my work situation shows me how I can I do in future, even in Germany, different. I look good cheer in the new year 2011.
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